The last time I sat to write for the blog was the first week in March – now seemingly light years away. It is interesting to read my meanderings. At the time, life was quiet and I was re-beginning my book. I had written 5 chapters and although I liked what I had done, and there were plenty of stories, it felt as if I had lost my way. Newness has a sense about it, when it appears unexpected and uninvited in the midst of executing a plan – the activity grinds to a halt and quiet emerges.
Accustom as I have been to the hustle-bustle of the business world where there are always too many things to do, voices calling, and deadlines to meet, the creative quiet in which I found myself felt devoid of guideposts. So, I created some.
Note to Self: Remember Patience. Everything happens in its own time and way.
Patience is not what we learn in school or the business world – where results are created on a calendared schedule – semesters, school years, quarters, fiscal years. Yet, the underlying cadence of life is always a dance between action, quiet, regeneration, and perfect timing. It is easier to see results through action. The power of quiet requires trust.
Note to Self: Honor the Quiet and Listen.
I didn’t realize until things got quiet how much of my life had been driven by my to-do list and the frenetic energy in the business world. I don’t miss the seeming infinite number of emails that had been arriving in my inbox each day. Where does all the activity go when it gets quiet?
Well, I realized how much chatter there is in my head. Although the outside activity calmed down, the internal “to-do list program” was still in high gear – complete with deadlines. How interesting it was to realize that it was often easier to ignore the emails, than it was diverting attention from my mindful chatter. This came as a surprise to me -watching the chatter find channels around my meditation and yoga practices. Amazing.
As is often said, awareness is the first step – the major key – to any change. This was true for me. As I honored the chatter for what it was, I also turned my attention to the “Sounds of Silence” around me. Birds singing. Chipper, the cat, quietly walking across the room. Trees moving in the breeze. Children playing. Me, breathing. I began to create space for the newness to be heard.
It took no time at all for newness to appear. I found places to begin again for the book – each one exciting, full of information and the writing naturally flowed in a new way. The chatter was still there – assessing the work I had done and was doing. The difference now was that I had a new vocabulary to get through the chatter and to consciously find trust for the creative space.
I was happy, and felt content as the new plans emerged. Then, with John Lennon’s lyrics dancing in my head … “Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans”…. new adventures appeared. For the first time ever, a simple jury summons turned into me actually getting put on a jury – for a week. Book writing, on hold, I met a whole new group of people. It was amazing how easily and quickly everyone connected. We will likely never see each other again, and yet, it is expansive to feel how we touched each other’s lives.
Then, like a thunderstorm rolling in, my body got hit with an unscheduled de-tox program, compliments of a viral infection. It was another interesting week and reminded me of what it feels like to completely surrender. It’s not as if I had a choice in the matter, I was too tired to even have mind-chatter. This time, I re-discovered the gift of our bodies’ amazing ability to heal. Writing this – feeling good has never felt so good.
Final Note to Self: Live, Laugh, Love.
In the busyness, in the quiet, in the planned, and in the newness of every day.
Happy Day To You!